The Election is F’ing Freaking Me Out: How to Stay Grounded in the Weeks Ahead
A quick Google search tells me everyone and their cousin is writing about election anxiety right now, and for good reasons. According to a survey by the American Psychological Association, 69% of Americans say Tuesday’s election is a “significant stressor.”1 I notice my own anxiety as a sort of queasiness in my stomach, and an increase in avoidance behaviors like shutting down or checking out (or writing a blog about election anxiety instead of feeling my feels…lolz.)
First, a little compassion and validation. I want to normalize that it is indeed pretty rough out there, and that you have very understandable reasons to feel scared and overwhelmed. One of our tendencies when we feel difficult emotions is to get critical—we tell ourselves to pull it together, get into stories about how other people have it worse, and engage in some "mean sports coach" style yelling at ourselves, saying things like "IF YOU'RE STRESSED THAN DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT DAMMIT."
Can we all agree that more anger and yelling is not the answer right now? If you're feeling anxious and stressed, try practicing some compassionate self-talk instead. Speak to yourself like you would a scared friend or child. Say to yourself something like “it’s understandable to feel afraid right now.” Remind yourself that emotions are a normal and natural part of being human, and that we're all in the feelings stew together.
How to Work with Election Anxiety and Panic
Now that we've practiced some self-compassion (and hopefully made a commitment to ourselves to stop the internal yelling), let's bring in a few more skills you can try to help keep you grounded in the weeks ahead:
- Continue to normalize and validate your feelings
If you have a pulse, you're probably going to feel many, many emotions in the coming days and weeks. Hope, anger, frustration, shock, fear, overwhelm, etc., etc. You've heard Jung's whole "what you resist, persists" thing, right? The more we try to control, push away, and get rid of our emotions, the more they up their bids for our attention.
In order to move towards instead of away from difficult emotions, try the "yes" practice by Tara Brach by saying "yes" to each emotion as it arises.2 Yes doesn't have to mean wanting the emotion, or liking the emotion. The "yes" is instead validation of the reality of the emotion. "Yes to fear" doesn't mean I like or want to feel fear, it just means I'm acknowledging and normalizing the feeling of fear as it comes up. In DBT this is called radical acceptance. I love the "radical" part; it has a rebellious counter-culture feel to it. When I remind myself of radical acceptance, I can lean into an image of myself in a leather jacket, accepting the s**t out of my emotions. - Remember to breathe
Sounds pretty obvious, but it’s amazing how often we forget to take a few full, intentional breaths throughout the day. Experiment with taking a full breath in, then a slow, extended exhale. Try the physiological sigh breath: two inhales through the nose and a big audible sigh when you exhale. The idea behind the physiological sigh is that it supports the “rest and digest” part of our nervous system, pulling us out of our fight/flight/freeze response.3 If we're not intentional, it would be easy to end up living in fight/flight/freeze in the weeks ahead. Living in survival parts of our nervous system makes life feel more scattered, chaotic, and unmanageable. So if you notice feeling dysregulated and all over the place, take some intentional breaths. - Make a self-soothing kit
This is a sort of mental health first aid kit you can use to soothe yourself via your five senses. Your mental health first aid kit should contain a grounding image, like a picture of your dog or your favorite spot in the desert. Add a relaxing smell like an essential oil or a fragrant plant. Bring in something calming to touch like a polished stone or a scrap of soft cloth. Ask yourself what tastes or mouth sensations you find soothing. Be prepared to cue up a song or tune into natural sounds like aspen leaves rustling or the river burbling over rocks. The point of this mental health first aid kit isn't to get rid of difficult emotions (because Jung, remember?) Instead, it's a way of caring for yourself in a simple and pre-planned way during a moment of stress. - Remember what you care about
Dr. Steven Hayes, one of the founders of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, often reminds people that we "hurt where we care, and care where we hurt." Hurt you are feeling around our current political landscape likely points towards something you care about deeply. Fear and grief mean something is really important to you, whether that be the rights and safety of women, proper and equitable medical care for trans folks, or affirmation of the lives and rights of Black, Latino, and Indigenous people. See if you can put that care into action in the coming weeks, whether it be texting a vulnerable friend, donating to a cause, or volunteering. - Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries
I know it's hard to accept, but checking your phone every 3 minutes is not going to change the results of the election. Checking your phone every 3 minutes will spin you out, unground you, and contribute to ongoing anxiety and panic. Put some limits on your news consumption. Leave your phone at home and take a walk. Be discerning about the texts you send and receive. Walk away from heated workplace conversations. If you're driving, listen to music instead of the radio for awhile. It's ok to take care of yourself without fully disengaging. Doing so is a boundary, not a weakness, and helps you maintain your capacity for engagement in the long run.
I hope these suggestions on caring for yourself in the midst of election anxiety and panic help you respond more flexibly when you notice yourself feeling overwhelmed. Remember that it's ok to ask for help, whether that be from a friend, family member, mentor, or trained mental health professional (that's me!) I offer a free 15 minute consultation call to anyone interested in working with me, and would love to hear from you.
References
1. American Psychological Association: Stress in America
https://www.apa.org/pubs/reports/stress-in-america/2024
2. Tara Brach's Blog: The Practice of Saying Yes
https://www.tarabrach.com/practice-of-saying-yes/
3. Standford Medicine: Cyclic sigh breathing
https://scopeblog.stanford.edu/2023/02/09/cyclic-sighing-can-help-breathe-away-anxiety/